What is Temper?

27th October, update. With heavy hearts we have had to postpone next weekend’s course start, “tier 2”  worries for too many clients.  It is possible that the dates planned for December will also not run.  We are thinking a fresh start in January, maybe a week later than currently planned, virus situation permitting.  Temper is a registered charity focused mainly on working with people whose behaviour in their intimate relationships is a cause for concern.  We work closely with violent, aggressive, abusive people to help them understand why they behave in such ways and to help them bring about changes in their behaviours.

Temper was devised in 1994/5 and improvements are continuously being made to the programme in the light of the experience of more than 1,000 clients who have completed the work, both men and women, and the availability of much greater research into what works and what doesn’t. This has also been brought about an explosion of knowledge through  neuroscience.

We work on the basis that in the vast majority of relationships emotions drive behaviour, not a desire for “power and control”.
“Anger management” is often what is deemed to be needed by the authorities and this was where we started. But emotions drive behaviour. It is much more likely that an individual will need to learn how to “regulate” his or her emotions.  Anger may well be one of them, but some cases are really much more about their other primary emotions of fear, or disgust, or trust and other secondary, discrete emotions, shame, jealousy, envy and others.

Temper’s intensive, therapeutically informed course was designed to help bring about changes in the behaviours associated with domestic violence. The focus may be on all or any of the following:

physical violence,  verbal abuse, aggression, emotional abuse, financial abuse, sexual abuse.

Before participants can be accepted onto the programme an initial assessment meeting lasting between 1 and 2 hours is required. Most usually this meeting is face-to-face in the client’s own home or near to where the client lives. When this is not possible then a Face-time, Skype or telephone interview replaces it.

Each course runs as a closed group. To complete the course takes two weekends, usually one month apart.  The total course time is 36 hours over the two weekends. The intervening time allows what has been learnt in the first half to be practised and processed and developed in the second half. Both halves of the work must be completed in the same group. A very small percentage of clients require more extensive work. This may then be offered by Temper or by referrals to or suggestions made as to other, more specific, and useful sources of help. There are a maximum of 8 places available per course.

We believe in early and effective intervention so we always try to engage with the client as quickly as possible because of the risks involved to all concerned.  Our target is to meet with clients within two weeks of their initial contact with us. Following an individual’s contact it usually takes about three weeks to a month to complete all the initial processes prior to taking part in a group course. Our experience is that last-minute arrivals can be impulsive and then either not join a group or settle into the work. But, if there is a space available, we will always do our best to engage with late arriving individual.